Thursday, June 17, 2004

I am so bored.

My boss and her boss are overseas at a trade show, and my co-worker, who usually keeps me occupied during the day, is on her honeymoon. Even our admin has the day off. I took Tuesday as a mental health/feeling like shit due to allergies day. Man, they are baaad news this year. Everyone I know that has them (including me) is exhausted, with the white pasty face and big black allergic shiners under their eyes. For anyone interested in the science behind allergic shiners, they are caused when there is increased blood flow to the sinuses. The skin around the eyes is very thin and see-through, so you can see this better. My breathing seems ok, but no drug seems to work for me for my upper respiratory allergies. I've tried:

  • Claritin (now available over the counter): Makes me sleepy
  • Zyrtec (prescribed by my allergist) Knocked me out so cold that M had to physically shake me awake in the morning when I took it at bedtime.
  • Allegra is useless.
  • Alavert is the same thing as Clartin, according to my pharmacist.

So I take 10 mg of Singulair at bedtime, which is supposed to control allergies as well as asthma. Works well for the asthma — peak flow is pretty normal — but allergies, fuggetaboutit. When things get bad, I take Sudafed. It makes my heart race and ups my blood pressure, but at least I can breathe.

ALLERGIES SUCK!

M calls my assortment of vitamins and prescription meds "the stuff of an 82-year-old woman, not a 30-year-old." Half of the vitamins I take are because we are trying to conceive. I want a baby. And yet sometimes I don't. I look at children with a longing eye, and now that I've been married two years and have a three-bedroom house with a big yard, it's natural that we try to have a kid. At the same time, I like being able to come and go as we please. I like having money in my wallet. I like my job, and it's undecided as to whether I would come back to work after having a baby. The changes to my relationship with M scare me, too. He is anxious to have a child — I almost want to say to him, YOU carry it.

Gotta get some work done. Wake me when today's over.

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