A religious experience
Yesterday, M had his treatment. It went fairly well, except that his blood pressure is significantly elevated, and they don't know why. I'm a bit concerned. He is going to follow up with the doc.
One thing this whole experience has done is put me back in touch with my faith. I was raised pretty strict Catholic, and the "you WILL go to church" attitude turned me off. Couple that with the priest sexual abuse scandal here in Mass, and M and I pretty much stayed away from church. I consider myself spiritual but not religious, as I do have a relationship with God and pray on a regular basis. So I've made it a ritual to go down to the hospital chapel while M is having his treatment and pray for him.
Yesterday, someone had left a rosary in the chapel, and I picked it up and started praying aloud. If you're not Catholic, there are two prayers you say over and over: the Hail Mary and the Our Father. I've known these prayers by heart since I was 3, so it's comforting to repeat them. Kind of like a mantra.
So I'm praying away and enjoying the room and the silence when this lady comes in with a tearstained face. I didn't want to bother her, but she turned to me and asked me to say a prayer for her sister, who is in critical condition. I asked her how old her sister was. Choking back tears, she says 34, and she has cancer, and her name is Anna. Man, I had to bite my lip from bursting into tears. My husband is 33. I told her about M, and she asked his name so she could pray for him, and I told her. She then said she asked the Blessed Mother if her sister was going to be alright and went to a religious place, where she found a rock with Jesus and the Holy Family on it. She showed it to me and asked if I saw it, which I didn't, but I told her I did. She wished me luck and left. I walked back to M and told him what happened. It was only then I let myself cry.
How can there be such suffering in the world? Why do people have to get sick and die who are so young? Hell, why do old people have to die -- can't we all just live forever? These are all mysteries that only God knows. All I know is, I'm wearing my cross, and I feel very close to Him right now.
One thing this whole experience has done is put me back in touch with my faith. I was raised pretty strict Catholic, and the "you WILL go to church" attitude turned me off. Couple that with the priest sexual abuse scandal here in Mass, and M and I pretty much stayed away from church. I consider myself spiritual but not religious, as I do have a relationship with God and pray on a regular basis. So I've made it a ritual to go down to the hospital chapel while M is having his treatment and pray for him.
Yesterday, someone had left a rosary in the chapel, and I picked it up and started praying aloud. If you're not Catholic, there are two prayers you say over and over: the Hail Mary and the Our Father. I've known these prayers by heart since I was 3, so it's comforting to repeat them. Kind of like a mantra.
So I'm praying away and enjoying the room and the silence when this lady comes in with a tearstained face. I didn't want to bother her, but she turned to me and asked me to say a prayer for her sister, who is in critical condition. I asked her how old her sister was. Choking back tears, she says 34, and she has cancer, and her name is Anna. Man, I had to bite my lip from bursting into tears. My husband is 33. I told her about M, and she asked his name so she could pray for him, and I told her. She then said she asked the Blessed Mother if her sister was going to be alright and went to a religious place, where she found a rock with Jesus and the Holy Family on it. She showed it to me and asked if I saw it, which I didn't, but I told her I did. She wished me luck and left. I walked back to M and told him what happened. It was only then I let myself cry.
How can there be such suffering in the world? Why do people have to get sick and die who are so young? Hell, why do old people have to die -- can't we all just live forever? These are all mysteries that only God knows. All I know is, I'm wearing my cross, and I feel very close to Him right now.
<< Home