Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The layoff diaries continue

So yes, I am still without a job. As I've mentioned, this layoff is a lot easier than the previous one for a multitude of reasons, the biggest being my son. He is a joy and great company. He's smart (I'm not the only one who thinks so -- doc couldn't believe he knows more than 50 words at 18 months), sweet and really fun. I am starting to see the appeal of the SAHM life. And quite frankly, I don't want to go back to a 60-hour-a-week slog of a job. I want to work part-time to keep my foot in the workforce and get a chance to really be involved in raising my little guy.

But as nice as it is to be home with the Boo, pulling him out of daycare was truly horrible. I cried all the way there and back on his last day. I know intellectually I did not fail him, but emotionally that's exactly how I felt. So now I need to find another group situation to get him some socialization and education. We're going to try Gymboree and see how that goes.

As for benefits, I was lucky enough to get them working 27 hours a week at my old place; however, I'm realistic that I may not be able to get into a similar situation. So for now, there's our old friend COBRA and unemployment.

I'm better than I was before about this, and I know a lot of people are in the same (sinking) boat, but it feels almost like somebody died or I got dumped hard. Every day takes away a little more of the hurt. I'm looking forward to when I can just be neutral and completely OK with everything. As for now, I do feel blessed I get this time with the boy. It's such a cliche, but they really do grow up fast.

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